secrets

11/12/10
Tonight I was driving to the outlet mall with Noah to pick out shirts for him and Kev to wear for our family photos tomorrow. Out of the blue he turned to me and said "mommy, do you have any secrets?" I asked him what he meant and he said "you know, do you have things in your head that nobody knows about". I got a little concerned that he might want to talk to me about something so I told him "yes, I think everyone has secrets Noah. It's not necessarily a bad thing as long as they aren't hurting anyone. Sometimes people just keep things to themselves because they are too personal to share". I asked him if he had any secrets and his response was "not right now, but I wonder if I will when I get older". He said he doesn't think he can have secrets from me because I'm his mom. I (of course) loved that answer. Then he got really quiet and said "I love you". It completely melted me. We talked about how he is getting older and he may feel like it will be hard to talk to me about things. I told him how I hope that we can always be close like we are now, and how I hope that he can always talk to me. He said he thinks he will because I "try to understand things". I think there must be a moment in your parenthood where you TRULY know you are doing a good job. For me, having that conversation did it. My son is ten, which means he has spent over half the time that he likely will living with me... which means I only likely have half of the time left. The weight of that truth is difficult, but I know, beyond a doubt, that we are raising an amazing child.